Humanity Online: World Sanctuary

2Nightfury tries to run, but he's no match for the combined efforts of the rest of his team.      3

Surprisingly, Nanuk's the most brutally efficient in hobbling his escape, trussing him up like a prized pig in magic-enforced ropes no one even knew the Shaman was carrying.     

"I'm too logical a next choice," Nanuk hisses in near-panic. "No way in hell am I working directly under that maniac!"     

'Okay,' Nightfury thinks, 'maybe not so suprising.'     

Atropos destroys Nightfury's last hope of escape when she helps him up into a sitting position, only to then ignore his state of bondage, and in fact, conjure even more magic rope to finish the job. She ties glowing silver thread around his draconic horns and pink hat in an elaborate bow, leaving him looking like a demented Christmas present.     

'I knew that smirk heralded my doom.' He groans.     

"Sweet, now that's settled, let's talk logistics." Taliesin plops onto the floor next to Nightfury and gestures for everyone else to join. While the others find their own spaces in the circle, Taliesin transforms into his shadow cat form and curls up half in Nightfury's lap.     

"Nngh!" Nightfury exclaims through his gag.     

"Purrrrrr," Taliesin replies.      

"Grmphgmble!" Nightfury says.     

"Yes yes, don't worry," Taliesin soothes, "we're all sitting on the floor so you won't feel left out. We know how you like to feel like part of the group."     

Eyes wide in offended horror, Nightfury is suddenly reminded that Taliesin joined their little group in the first place because he was stalking Erebus, and that the sweet, innocent Pu`ca is actually the most terrifying person he's ever met.     

By the time the discussion is over, Nightfury has accepted this is his life now, and even catches himself unconsciously petting Taliesin's head with his bound wrists whenever he agrees with one of the crazy kid's ideas.     

Oddly, this isn't the strangest thing to happen in the circle.     

Atropos seemingly didn't get enough of tying pretty bows and decides to undo Kara's standard Valkyrie system braids and replait her silver-lavender hair into even more elaborate twists. She replaces Kara's leather hair tie and snake fang with more glittery silver thread and a Celtic knot hairpiece held together by a tiny dagger.      

Apparently, the snake fang had been only aesthetic, but Atropos assures Kara the hair dagger is coated in poison and wieldable at any time.     

Nightfury sighs. Great. Because Kara needed to be *more* deadly.     

Then when the discussion turns to specific action items for the AI and devs, the goddess tugs over Nanuk and styles his long white hair, too, even giving him a trim with her Fate Scissors.     

In the end, Taliesin's overall idea is officially approved by Atropos, with the acknowledgement that the details may change when the devs get into the nitty gritty of reconfiguring the code.     

By the time they're done, even Nanuk has come to appreciate both the objectively logical merits of the plan, as well as the subjectively hilarious ones. (Turns out having a god play with your hair is relaxing enough to loosen up even the most uptight person.)      

The Shaman stands to stretch, and huffs a laugh. "If we really put in the work, we could keep this secret from Erebus all the way until the first 20-man dungeon. It's the first Team Dungeon instead of Party Dungeon, so it's the first a guild can claim. And since we're focusing on the MSQ, that's weeks or even months away."     

Atropos shakes her head at their antics, but does not dampen their desire to fuck with the number one Chaos Goblin. "It will take the minor deities some time to enact the full changes you wish, though the Nova System has already started putting your plan in place. I'd estimate the minor deities need no more three hours to work with Nova to fully set the Guild Protocols."     

Taliesin jumps up and pops back to human with a whoop. Startled, Nightfury jerks, then falls over with a soft thwump onto the plush rug.     

Unfortunately, Taliesin doesn't notice, too busy pulling Kara to her feet with a sharp grin. "See? Told you we'd make the devs cry before the day was through. Hope they have fun re-programming an entire Central Function in an afternoon."     

Kara's bloodthirsty smile in response is almost feral.     

Atropos freezes one last time while her eyes ripple and she communes with the Nova AI. "Success. The final approval has gone through. The Guild Page has been updated on the Main System Site with all relevant information. Taliesin, as the holder of the Guild Token, you will receive an Aether Alert when it is safe for you to transfer the token to your preferred Liaison."     

"Thanks, Atropos!"     

"You are most welcome, tiny chaos monster." She gives Taliesin one last pat, then with a snip of her Fate Scissors, disappears in a blaze of flames.     

"Yasss! I can't believe that worked!" Somehow, Taliesin is bouncing even more than usual.     

"You can always accomplish what you put your mind to," Nanuk tells him with pride.      

"Even when it's insane and probably shouldn't ever be allowed to happen," Kara mutters.      

Nanuk wants to be offended on his baby brother's behalf, but…     

Well.     

"At any rate," Nanuk continues, clearing his throat, "if we actually want to create a guild before Erebus wakes up, there's still much to do." He skims through the Guild Protocols, and though the full text has almost doubled in length, the Guild Creation Steps haven't changed all that much. "We're going to need to grind some levels for a bit, as well as accumulate quite a bit of gold."     

"Plus we need 9 members on top of the Guild Leader, right?" Kara says. "And they have to sign in person?"     

"No worries! I already have the members in mind, and I have plenty of time to go around and collect signatures," Taliesin assures them. "You guys just focus on leveling up."     

"What about you?"      

"I hit Level 15 hours ago."     

Kara and Nanuk are a bit shocked, but Nightfury's not. Kid went traipsing about previously unexplored maps with Erebus, after all.     

"Then I guess we can assume Erebus is also Level 15," Nanuk says. It isn't really a question, but Taliesin answers him anyway.     

"Oh yeah, he hit that Day One."     

'What the everloving fuck,' Nightfury silently whines.     

Nanuk seems to be thinking the same, so in a bid to avoid cursing in front of his impressionable sibling, he moves on, as if new information is going to somehow make him feel better. "What about the gold, then? I know Erebus is somehow loaded, even though the game's only just begun, and it should be impossible, and it's fine, I'm not jealous or anything, just confused, and perhaps frustrated, but it's fine, but if we don't have enough for the Guild Creation payment, it won't be fine, so—"     

"Nan, breathe bro, it really IS fine!" Taliesin cuts him off with a worried pat on the back. "We made a killing on the raids this morning, remember? Ossa cut us in for a portion of the bookkeeping profits, plus we bet practically all our money that we'd clear Redcap and then that we'd crush the Horsemen."     

"Oh. Right." It appears Nanuk had forgotten.     

"So what are we talking, kiddo?" Kara asks. "I take it the odds were good?"     

"Ha, you can say that. We could probably afford our own 1-Star houses now, turrets and all."     

In a rare loss of propriety, Nanuk actually whoops out loud. "So we're finally catching up to Erebus's early lead!"     

Taliesin chokes back a laugh. "Er, to put this in terms you may understand…Chaos Party might be 'turret' rich, but by the end of the week Erebus should be 'buy a private island and bring dinosaurs back to life' rich."     

After that cold dose of reality, Nanuk chooses the higher road and does not attempt to strangle Erebus in his sleep.      

Instead, he stiffly marches straight out the door, muttering obscenities under his breath and pretending nothing's wrong like a goddamn grown-up.     

His teammates follow, stifling their giggles. As Nanuk trudges down the stairs, he and Kara strategize over which Tara Rep Quests are the most efficient, then agree to meet up with Taliesin and the other possible guild mates at the Teleportation Portal in an hour. Taliesin will drop off Excalibur for its first upgrade while he's waiting to meet up with the others and explain what's up.     

Armed with a plan of action, everyone rushes out to complete as many items on their checklist as possible before Erebus wakes up.      

Except in their excitement, they forget one important thing.     

Nightfury's sigh is muffled by his gag, but is no less heartfelt for its diminished volume.     

In fact, it quickly becomes a favored sound byte among the devs.     

Resigned to his fate, Nightfury doesn't even bother trying to figure a way out of his bonds; he just rolls over to a more comfortable spot on the rug in front of the fireplace, swipes open the Guild Protocols page, downloads the full text so he can highlight sections and add notes, and opens to page one.     

If he's going to do this thing, he may as well do it right.     

The only thing worse than being a Vice Guild Leader, is being worse at guild leading than the actual Guild Leader, who doesn't even know he's in a fucking guild.